Friday, December 15, 2006

Dear Tivo

Tivo, I really want to love you. Really. But it's just not working out. I admit, some of it's my fault. I'm complicated. I have cable and satellite, and that's tough on any DVR. I know you try to accomodate them both, but you get so confused, which makes me confused. I ask you to record something from the satellite, you promise to do it, but end up recording the cable channel instead. Maybe I'm asking too much, but you let me down when it comes to the small stuff too. Take channel changing for instance. No, it's not because you need those IR extension thingies - you know looks don't mean anything to me. You have so much trouble finding my local stations. Yeah, they're all the way in the upper 900s, and that's DirecTV's problem, not yours. But it's not like they're on Mars or something. Plus, there've been plenty of times when you switch to the wrong station and just won't let go. Believe me, it's no picnic having to sit through 5 minutes of the fantabulous jewelry spectavaganza on the home shopping channel while I try to convince you that this is not a good place to be.

You're such a nice box, Tivo. Your onscreen menus and remote are intuitive and well-designed. Don't ever let anyone tell you that your bubbly sounds aren't cute. And you network well too. (I know my computer said some unkind things because your Tivo Desktop software kept making him crash at shutdown, as if he needed a reason to spontaneously reboot.) Anyway, you don't need a wanna-be-techie-geek like me criticizing you for every little thing. You deserve to be happy and I know you'll find someone who'll appreciate your best qualities.


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